Weight Loss – Get Honest or Get Fatter!

I never thought of myself as a perfectionist or a liar . . . but I was. I was usually an all or nothing type of person. I couldn’t stay perfect on my diets, so I’d give up until I could start over the next day, the next Monday, or the next month. It was like I was on a stationary bike, riding hard but going nowhere. Plus, I was frustrated and angry most of the time. I felt like a big fat failure.

One day, I saw my actions for what they were – human nature. I never lived up to the standards I made for myself. It was exhausting. So, I re-thought my path to reach the goals I set. No more being down on myself for natural falls or not being 100% all the time. It’s such a pleasant change to just give myself a break – to say, “It’s ok. I stumbled but will keep at it.”

However, actually doing this mental decision in my daily life was and is tough. Yesterday, I ate 220 calories over my goal because I chose chocolate candy after lunch. It still bothers me that I ate a sugary, unhealthful snack and also threw a wrench in my calorie allotment for the day, but I’m not quitting my eating-healthfully program. I’m not bingeing like I once would. So, I stumbled. I’m moving on. I’m getting a bit used to this imperfection stuff. It feels pretty good, too. I’m still down 6 pounds, and it’s slow going, but I’m learning.

My non-scale victories for the week were not berating myself and not giving up on my goal. I also took a multivitamin each day.

I’ve had a rough day today, so far. Mentally, I want to eat for some reason, but I haven’t had anything but coffee because I’m not physically hungry. It’s a very strange combination. I am being honest with myself, though, and not trying to hide my actions. This keeps me from the binges and most of the poor choices in meals.

I’ve realized that this issue with food will be a lifetime struggle. I’m in my fifties, short, not super active, and have had a hysterectomy, so my metabolism is sluggish. I don’t exercise per se because I’m still too large and get out of breath too easily (I also have asthma). So, for now, I just get as much physical exercise as I can doing housework and running errands.

It’s almost summer. That reminds me of my past and drinking a large Sonic slush each afternoon because it was cold and kept the hundred degree days at bay. I looked up the calorie amount in a large slush. It’s 470! That is a third of my daily allowance.

So, my imperfections are something I need to accept and the fact that I need to log my intake of foods and beverages daily is obvious.

It’s time to be real about my problem with food and tackle it the best I can. It’s time to get honest or get fatter.

Why Do People Lie and Cheat?

 

I don’t get it. Why do adults cheat when there isn’t real reason to? Example: I play bingo at a local community spot once a week. One older woman uses cards from weeks past that didn’t have wins . . . and she uses them in present weeks to “improve” her chances at winning a bingo. We noticed her playing extra cards with ink already on them, and we were told by those sitting next to her that she does this but when confronted, she merely became frustrated and threw away her current game.

I ask you, why does she do this (or try to) week after week? She isn’t destitute. She has a car and plenty of food. So, why lie and cheat? She knows better or she wouldn’t have to hide her actions.

The winnings are paid from the  nonprofit company’s cash drawer that holds the other players’ game money. They paid for their games for the present night and aren’t lying or cheating but “Ethyl” is. She’s cheating the nonprofit out of funds that could be used to help people in real need, and she’s cheating her fellow bingo players who might have a chance to bingo the HONEST way. Ugh! Makes me angry.

 

The leader of the nonprofit told her he knew about her antics and to stop them or she would not be welcome back to our bingo games . . . then low and behold, he caught her “saving” already-played games for future nights. He made her throw away her current cards as she used them.

It’s like babysitting an unethical kid. I suggested we kick her out weeks back but the leaders are trying to give her a chance to shape up. Yeah, right.

Liars and cheaters really tick me off.

There’s nothing innocent about it. Nothing cute about it. And nothing “ok” about it. Ethyl, stop it!

 

I need to hang around with my real friends – ones who are ethical, honest, and play fairly. I think I’ll do a little reading from a book by the Dalai Lama about treating other creatures with respect and care.

Wish me luck. LOL.